With Christmas fast approaching many people will start to declutter their houses, order new sofas (no doubt tempted by the "guaranteed Christmas delivery" offers seen on tv) and generally have an early spring clean.
The problem is, it's a busy time of year what with seeing friends, family and parties to go to.
As a result, it's not always easy for people to find the time to get rid of some of the larger and more bulky items.
Well, guess who can help these poor souls at this busy time of year?
Yhep - you guessed it. Your ex!
After all, isn't your ex just one of those really charitable people who loves helping other people out?
And had you forgotten that your ex also owns a small removal van?
I'm sure if you look carefully at their van, you'll also see that your ex is prepared to work unsociable hours as well :-)
Now then, surely it is your social duty to make people aware of your helpful ex.
After all, you'd be doing your ex and your community a favour, wouldn't you?!?!?
But I know what you're thinking. How can you tell everyone about your ex's service.
Well, this is really easy and what's more - it's untraceable to you.
In every town there is somewhere you can place a small calssified ad. For example:
Now you know where to place the classified ad, what should you say and how do you make it stick out - after all, you want everyone to know about your ex's helpful service!
Let's assume that you are using a standard piece of printer paper then you will want a nice big banner on the top.
Something like "Man With Van - $20 For 2 Hours" (or £20, Ä20 etc)
Next you ideally want a picture of a white van - try going to Google and searching for "Transit Van" - you'll get plenty of clipart there.
Underneath the picture, you'll need to put some compelling sales text.
How about: "Want to de-clutter before Christmas? I can help! From disposing of single bulky items to piles of bags and boxes - I am here for you. I'm fully insured and registered so you can be assured of a professional service"
Finally, you'll want to put your ex's name and number at the bottom.
A great tip here is to create small tear-off strips each containing your ex's contact details.
That way, people can just tear off one of the strips as opposed to having to make a note of the number themselves.
Plus - people tend to put these numbers to one side for later reference (remember, revenge is for life, not just Christmas!!!)
I'm sure by now you can imagine what's going to happen - your ex is going to be inundated with calls for their very much in demand service!
Like all the best revenge tactics, the great thing here is that the revenge will actually happen when you're not around and therefore, you cannot be implicated.
Metaphorically, all you're doing is loading the gun - you're not actually pulling the trigger!
Sure, your ex may think you've got something to do with it - but hey, they can't prove it and you can just sit back, smile and enjoy the sweet taste of revenge!
Don't forget to share your own revenge stories and experiences with me. Just drop me a line at email@example.com
Until the next time,
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